HELP CHILDREN EXPERIENCE THE MEANING BEHIND THE CELEBRATION ON THANKSGIVING DAY.
By my own admission I am not a Christmas kind of guy. Some brazen individuals even have the audacity to accuse me of being a Grinch. But no one can impugn my love of the Thanksgiving Holiday. Born from a beautiful historical tale of hardship, sharing, friendship and support, Thanksgiving gives us a very “teachable moment” with our children around these value lessons that will serve them well in life. Oh, and by the way there is the feast that I enjoy so much…
Sometimes it’s a challenge to convince children that Thanksgiving Day is really not all about the food. Sure there’s turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, cranberries, and pie. Oh yeah, don’t forget the pie(s!) But hidden inside this palate-driven holiday is an opportunity to highlight the meaning behind the celebration. It is, after all, a day to remember all of our good fortune and to give thanks.
So, this year as you prepare for your Thanksgiving Day festivities and as your guests arrive, (in addition to a bountiful meal), try these age-appropriate activities that will direct children, and adults, back to the true meaning of the holiday, and also create Thanksgiving Day memories that will last a lifetime. Here are some of my suggestions, but the sky is the limit here so use your imagination and help your family focus on the meaning of the day.
Ages 0-3
For the very young, holidays are about the nurturing and extra attention received from grandparents and other close family and friends. Try to provide time for fun interaction, with songs, poems and stories that celebrate the season. Provide toddlers with some crayons and coloring books, and invite all the adults to color along. The activity will provide a beautiful bond between you and your child while exposing them to some receptive communication around the values of the holiday.
Ages 4-7
Children as they grow older may like to help with the dinner prep. The important point here is not that the child cook the meal but is present with family to help bring together the generations to share in the love that surrounds the table. I have seen some moms and dads get very creative with this age group. Make your young guests feel special when Thanksgiving dinner is served atop a custom-made tablecloth they designed. Break out the crayons, or markers, and allow each child to draw their own artwork depicting a thankful day. Later, play a game of “Alphabet Thanks,” where children draw from a bowl of letters, and then give thanks for something that begins with the letter they picked. They may need some coaching or nudging but this activity will help create a cognitive set of some tangible things to be thankful for in their lives. It can also be a lot of fun!
Ages 8-12
This age group is ready to put the spirit of thanksgiving into practice. They are now of a developmental age where they can begin to see needs outside of their own. It is also a very good time to expose them to the reality that there are adults and children in their communities who have much less than they do in terms of food, family or possessions. A simple thing to organize is to let them get involved in canvassing their neighborhood and collecting canned food items for those in need, or your local food bank. For fun on Thanksgiving Day, have this age group use a video camera to film their own home movie about giving thanks. Guests can be entertained as they view the finished work on the TV during dessert. Or, for the more musically minded, have the children borrow the tune from their favorite pop or rap song and replace the lyrics with a seasonal message. Your children will surprise you with their creativity and depth of understanding around the notions of giving and thanks. I myself am putting together a Pitbull medley of Thanksgiving rap…lookout family and friends.
Age 13-18
This age is perfect for hands-on community service. Visit the local food bank or nearby retirement home, and have them pitch in by serving the holiday meal. Another fun idea is to invite your teens to compete in a pie-baking contest, with the table deciding the winning recipe. This is a fun way to have your teens contribute something of their own creation to the table in a way of giving to the family. I remember when our son was around 13 we began to volunteer on Thanksgiving Day at the local City Mission to help prepare and serve food to the homeless. At this age, I think this commitment allowed him to shape a reality that there were people who had needs much greater than his own and it was our responsibility to try and help however we could. The idea with any of these giving activities for this age group is to help them move away from the developmental narcissism that haunts the adolescent and provide them with a real object lesson in seeing the world from a larger perspective than just from their own needs, wants and desires.
All Ages
While the food and feast may be the stars of the show on Thanksgiving, I think it is always fun to engage everybody at the table in activities that focus on the true meaning of Thanksgiving. Adult and child alike can give pause and think of what they are thankful for in their lives. We always post the menu on the door for family and friends to see before they come into the house. This year in addition to the menu I am going to have a paper and pen available so that everyone who enters can write at least one thing that they are thankful for in their lives. Before we experience the bounty of our table we all will give pause to reflect on all the good in our lives, we will give thanks for our health and happiness, we will think about those who cannot be with us and about those that are no longer with us. We will ask for peace and contentment for all…
Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday not because of the food, but because it brings family and friends together to share a time of comfort, support and giving thanks for one another and for others.
Enjoy the holiday, enjoy your children and help them to know and love this holiday for what is represents. Wishing an early Happy Thanksgiving to parents, children and families everywhere!
Be well, joe cozzo
